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Writer's pictureStephanie Stone

Marvel Couples: The Gift of Tony and Pepper


Guest Opinion Piece by Dr. Sandra Eckard


If you asked me who I most adore in terms of women in the Marvel World, or who has a fascinating story, I would instantly tell you Peggy Carter. She is a great action heroine who is built so well in one film, Captain America: The First Avenger, that I was instantly visiting my local comic shop buying back-issues of comics so that I could learn more about her. Strong, independent, and likeable—she is a good role model for little girls, and her tragic love story with Steve was softened by the two-season series that focused on her life afterwards—Agent Carter is a little gem of a show about her balance of self, career, and grief over a lost love.

But, you might ask, why did I title this blog entry about Tony and Pepper when I just blathered on in my opening about Peggy? When I first started brainstorming what I would write about for this blog, I honestly thought I would write about Steve and Peggy. But as I contemplated what I would write, I decided that I would, instead, focus my attention on the power of Pepper Potts—and I’ll spend the rest of this blog telling you why.


Pepper Potts debuted in 1959’s Tales of Suspense #45, and she has served in several roles, from secretary to Happy Hogan’s love interest, to corporate CEO for Stark Industries over the years. She took a hiatus after Happy died in the comics in Civil War, and she was brought back as a primary character in 2008—interestingly, right around the time we would get the big screen MCU version with Gwyneth Paltrow’s Pepper in Iron Man.


I think that the press is often unimpressed with Pepper, and at first glance, it’s true that she’s not, on the surface, a powerful female character. She is the designated “love interest” for Tony Stark, and she is often in the damsel-in-distress role, leading to a big “save” moment to showcase Tony’s tech or motivation. When she disappeared from Tony’s life in Civil War, many were relieved, and that always had me flummoxed. I mean, I was always a Pepper fan—and I was always in the minority that I wanted to see, and believed we would, Pepper as Rescue. (Ask me another time why I love Iron Man 3.)


This blog, though, isn’t just about a character, but rather about a couple. And I truly believe that Pepper makes Tony better. In fact, his whole journey—his character arc—can be tied to his relationship with Pepper. I’m going to focus on three instances that I love to discuss, all small gems that show Tony’s growth over the three Iron Man films. The focus? Tony and gifts.


"...Pepper makes Tony better."

In the original Iron Man, we see the most self-centered version of Tony—and it’s easy to see how he changes and grows as a result of his time in the cave. However, let’s look instead at the party where he notices Pepper and her dress.


Tony: “Where’d you get that dress?”

Pepper: “Oh, it was a birthday present.”

Tony: “That’s great.”

Pepper: “From you, actually.”

Tony: “Well, I’ve got great taste.”

Tony is unfazed by the idea that she gave herself a present with his money. But let’s deconstruct it more: Tony doesn’t think of anyone outside himself, even though he thinks he does. Pepper bought her own present because he never would have.


We can move on to Iron Man 2. In this film, we get another gift-giving moment. This time, Tony knows Pepper is important to him, and he has screwed up, again, and wants to apologize. He stops at a roadside stand and buys strawberries to give her as a peace offering.


Tony: “Do you know how short life is? And if I never got to express… And by the way, this is somewhat revelatory to me. And I don’t care—I mean, I care. It would be nice. I’m not expecting you to—Look, here’s what I’m trying to say. I’m just going to say it…”

Pepper: “Let me stop you right here, okay? Because if you say “I” one more time, I’m going to actually hurl something at your head, I think. I am trying to run a company. Do you have any idea what that entails?”

Tony: “Yes.”

Pepper: “People are relying on you to be Iron Man and you’ve disappeared, and all I’m doing is putting out your fires and taking the heat of it. I am trying to do the job that you were meant to do. Did you bring me strawberries? Did you know that there’s only one thing on Earth that I’m allergic to?”

Tony: “Allergic to strawberries. This is progress Pepper. I knew there was a correlation between you and this.”

Pepper: “I need you…”

Tony: “I need you, too.”

Pepper, finishing her sentence: “…to leave now.”


So, as Tony points out, this exchange is progress; he does attempt to buy a gift, and he is genuinely sorry, but he still hasn’t stepped outside of his own thoughts or his own experiences enough to know how to apologize—or how to buy Pepper a proper gift.


This experience sets the stage for the opening of Iron Man 3, where at Christmas, Tony buys Pepper—now his live-in love—wait for it…a giant stuffed bunny. While he has taken time to pre-order a gift, and he has moved from letting her buy herself a present to buying it himself, it still rings both funny and sad in that it’s unusable (it takes up way too much space and can’t be used like a typical stuffed animal to snuggle) and, maybe more important, for the wrong holiday.


At the beginning of the film, he is obsessed with whether or not she likes it. Think about it: this bunny might be the first gift that he has ever spent time picking out himself. Pepper tries at first to be pleasant—not wanting to burst his bubble of happy. But the bunny comes up several times throughout the movie, such as when Maya Hansen, the scientist ex-girlfriend, stops by their house for help.


Maya: “Is...is that normal?”

Tony, defensive: “Yes, this is normal!”

Pepper: “Sadly, that...is very normal.”

Tony, getting upset: “It's a big bunny! Relax about it!”

Pepper: “Calm down!”

Tony, motioning to the gift: “I got this for you.”

Pepper: “I'm aware of that.”

Tony, a bit wounded: “You still haven't even told me that you liked it!”

Pepper: “I don't like it!”

Tony: “I asked you three—“

Tony, interrupting his own sentence: “You don't like it?!”


By the end of the film, we get two additional gift examples, both illustrating Tony’s growth and his desire to make this relationship work; after all, a couple is a twosome, not a single entity. Tony has spent all of the time between the first film and IM3 learning how to think about someone else’s needs that might be separate from his own.


First, there is the suit gift, the indicator he finally understands what Pepper wants. She wants to see him not be engulfed with his obsession with being Iron Man and trying to control everything. She wants him to be a partner who is present, not constantly distracted with what he is tinkering with. As the action concludes, Pepper and Tony are reunited—she worries that she still has the Extremis flowing through her veins.


Pepper: “Am I going to be okay?”

Tony: “No. You're in a relationship with me. Everything will never be okay. But I think I can figure this out, yeah. I almost had this 20 years ago when I was drunk. I think I can get you better. That's what I do. I fix stuff.”

Pepper, happy but hesitant: “And all your distractions?”

Tony: “Uh... I'm going to shave them down a little bit. Jarvis. Hey.”

JARVIS: “All wrapped up here, sir. Will there be anything else?”

Tony, with clarity: “You know what to do.”

JARVIS: “The Clean Slate Protocol, sir?”

Tony: “Screw it; it's Christmas. Yes. Yes.”

[Pepper hugs Tony as the Iron Man suits blow up.]

Tony, hesitantly: “Okay, so far? Do you like it?”

Pepper, happily hugging him tighter: “It’ll do.”


Tony is elated that he has finally learned how to give Pepper something she desires; but it’s more than that: he has learned, as a result of their interactions, how to think of others before himself.


He comes full circle by the end of the movie. At the coda, he has his shrapnel taken out of his chest so that he can finally fully live his life. We see him give Pepper one last gift: a jeweled necklace—red like his heart, or his Iron Man suit—with a chain made out of his shrapnel.


I feel that this gift-giving thread through the films shows that Pepper and Tony are an overlooked gem of a couple. They fight, they make-up, and they disagree often; but their relationship is key to Tony’s growth. He learns how to be a better person and a partner who realizes that a gift is about sharing his heart, not his wallet.


"I feel that this gift-giving thread through the films shows that Pepper and Tony are an overlooked gem of a couple."

In the end, I think that Cap and Peggy’s story is sweet and innocent—it’s also built upon a couple who dreams of a partner who is unattainable due to circumstances. It’s what romantic fantasy is built upon—and it is that: a fantasy. It’s wonderful and makes the audience hope that they somehow, despite time and obstacles, find each other. It’s wonderful. It makes us happy and helps us believe in love.



But Pepper and Tony, in contrast, aren’t perfect. They hit snags as they bump through their relationship. In the end, they show us how difficult it is to be in a relationship. And that is why I love Pepper and Tony. They are an underrated couple because their story is messy; they aren’t as dreamy as Steve and Peggy. However, their story reveals that love can change a person. And that’s a great gift that we can all watch and enjoy.



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